Being Mom is like Being the Bad Guy By Choice #Parenting

"I'm sorry my love but no"
Being a mom has to be one of the toughest jobs ever!  I spend 24 hours a day being a mom, even in my sleep I'm there by their side, half way asleep.  I'm a stay at home mom, not fully by choice but because there is no other option for us at the moment.  Most of the time I fully enjoy it, but that's most of the time.  I don't enjoy it 24 hours a day, and that's because I am human after all.  Moments I don't enjoy it are the moments when I have to be the bad guy.

I love my kids and probably would want to stay home with them given the choice, but wish I had the choice.  Wish my back wasn't against the wall so much.  With all that said, the parts that I don't fully enjoy is being the "boss" of my kids.  I want to play with my kids all the time, but sometimes I just can't and that simply sucks!
I have to set rules.  I have to make sure they're safe.  I have to be the bad guy in many scenarios when I have to say "no" to them.  I'm also a food allergy, and homeschool mom.  That combination is a recipe for the supreme bad guy. 

So to my kids when they're old enough to read this... 
I'm sorry I have to set screen time limits.
I'm sorry you have a bedtime.
I'm sorry you have to floss and brush multiple times a day.
I'm sorry but you do have to hold my hand when we cross the street.
I'm sorry you can't just do whatever you want all day.
I'm sorry you have to clean up after yourself if you make a mess.
I'm sorry you do have to do "school work" and study.
I'm sorry there are foods and products out in the world that aren't safe for you, making you be aware and cautious all the time.
But I promise even though I might always seem like the bad'll understand why one day.

I will always do my best and give my all to you all.

Inside I want to just play and break the same rules I seem to make but I want to make sure they learn, be safe, and be good people.  Parenting is tough.  But if I have to be the bad guy all the time for the price of raising happy safe healthy good people, I'll take it.  It sometimes breaks my heart for a second when my kids choose fun dad over me.  Or when my son who I felt so close to, now growing up goes to daddy to whisper and hide things from me, but it's all for the bigger picture.  I'll be the bad guy.  I'll be the one to set rules and have a million and one "commands" all day for them.  Being a full time food allergy, homeschooling mom isn't easy, specially when I don't have many friends & family supporting us.  To the many parents out there, I know you know my struggle.  It's not easy being the bad guy.  Between the "don't chew with your mouth full" and forcing your kids to buckle up in the car seat, we'll get through it with the fuel of laughter & giggles in between.  If we're doing anything right, one day our kids will thank us for all those times we had no choice but be the "bad guy."